Why it's worth going to Russia.

Almost five years ago today, I got my mission call to serve in Russia. When I first realized I would be serving in Russia, I was like, "Crap. Russia." I didn't want to go to Russia. The language seemed super hard, the culture and history didn't seem very interesting, the people never smiled, and I knew it would be a challenge living in a country that didn't even have cars or indoor plumbing.

When I got there in November 2009, I started learning what Russia was actually like.

No technology
First, there ARE cars and indoor plumbing. Before I went to Russia, I thought horses were still the main mode of transportation (the only things I knew about Russia, I'd learned from Fiddler on the Roof and Anastasia, so can you blame me????), but after being in Russia for a day I quickly realized that cars, indoor plumbing, and even light bulbs are just as common in Russia as they are in America. In fact, the biggest cities and tallest buildings I've ever seen are in Russia, so it is definitely just as modern and developed as America.



Unfriendly people
Everyone in America told me that Russians never smiled and were a pretty tough people to befriend. HOWEVER, some of the FIRST THINGS I saw in Russia were couples walking outside holding hands and SMILING, friends walking around together and SMILING, and people just looking like normal people, not like the communist robots I'd heard about. I realized that most of the Americans who'd told me about Russia had never actually been there, so how would they know what Russians are actually like?



Climate
Russia is effing cold. I had heard the word "cold" before my mission, but never actually knew what it meant. I'd lived in California basically my whole life, so the coldest I'd ever felt was, like, 32°F. When I got to Russia, winter was just starting, so it was 32ish°, which I thought was the coldest it could ever be. I was so cold, I wore two scarves: one for my neck and the other for my face. People told me I looked like a Muslim woman.



They'd laugh and say, "You know it's going to get colder, right?" and I'd laugh and say, "That's not even possible, right?" But it did get colder. The coldest I ever felt was -40° (which is where Fahrenheit and Celsius meet), but that wasn't typical. -5°F to -15°F was pretty normal. Cold, but livable.

I learned to enjoy the cold, so much so that when I went back to Russia after my mission, I made sure to go during the winter. To me, Russia isn't Russia if your nose hairs don't freeze.

Hard language
Yeah, Russian's hard, at least for me, no getting around that. The alphabet only takes, like, two weeks to learn, but actually speaking the language sucks butt. However, I think being able to understand is much more important than being able to express yourself. Listening for the few words I understood and paying attention to context went a long way in helping me understand what people were saying to me. And, since I had a mission companion, I could rely on him to say what needed to be said.

So the language is daunting, but it isn't everything.



Uninteresting history and culture
So Russians may not be the cold-hearted people that Americans make them out to be, but they certainly have a colorful history. They've existed as a people for nearly 1,000 years, so of course they've had some super interesting stuff happen. They were invaded by Huns, they drove the Huns out, they had fake tsars the people elected, they had real tsars the people killed, they had fake tsars they elected then decided to kill, they have beautiful literature and art, they had communism, they sent the first man into space, they had Stalin, they have Putin, and BORIS NEMTSOV WAS SHOT FIVE DAYS AGO OH MY GOSH WHERE IS THE TRUTH AT? So, interesting stuff.



Of course, I didn't know a lot of this while I was actually living in Russia since I was busy doing the WORK OF THE LORD, but I learned it in college after and it explained a lot of what I'd seen on my mission. So definitely take a Russian history course if you get the chance, especially if you've been to Russia before and you're wondering "What the eff???"

So I ended up having a blast in Russia. I finished my mission three and a half years ago, but I really wanted to go back, so that brings us to the next part of this story ....

Is it worth it to pay for a study abroad????? AKA I went to Eurussia on the cheaps

Gordy Yates had the big fat dream of going to Eurussia and having a cray cray vacay.**** So, he bought a plane ticket to Russia and started saving his money (lol -- really he just stopped going out to eat and buying deodorant). He left, traversed all across the Eurussian wilds for 24 blissful days, and returned a happy and fulfilled young gentleman. Do you want to make your cray cray dreams come true?

Looking so happy and so fly in Moscow.

If you want to make your cray cray dreams come true and want to get a small itsy-bitsy baby idea of what it might cost, here's a little break down:

• Multi-city (aka open-jaw) ticket to Eurussia (San Diego --> Moscow, Dublin --> Salt Lake) (United Airlines/Lufthansa): $903.26

• Traveler's insurance (probably a smart idea even though I don't know what it's for): $49.95

• Russian visa (Thanks, Obama/Putin): $351.90 (I got it through Travel Broker, which is a company that basically does all the paperwork for you and you pay them $100ish. So I could have gotten the visa for cheaper, but I really don't know how, so it was worth it in my oponion.)

• Flight from Moscow (Domodedovo) to London (Gatwick) (EasyJet): $158.53 (could've gotten it for, like, $50 if I'd bought it a month or two sooner :(((((( )

• Flight from London (Standsted) to Oslo (Rygge) (Ryanair): $24.51 (#unbelievablycheap)

• Flight from Oslo (Rygge) to Milan (Bergamo) (Ryanair): $21.09

• Bus from Austria/Germany back to Milan: $25.58

• Flight from Milan (Bergamo) to Dublin (Ryanair): $29.43

I bought all this (minus the bus ticket) BEFORE going to Europe.

Total pre-Euro costs: $1,564.25

Once I got to Eurussia, my bank charged me $5 every time I withdrew money at an ATM or 3% every time I used my debit card to pay for things. I always withdrew cash and avoided using my card. Some countries, like Norway, have chip cards instead of magnetic strip cards, so American cards don't always work, so I used cash 99.99% of the time. At the start of my trip, I withdrew in increments of $50ish, but by the end of trip, it was increments of $150ish.

A harbor in Norwegia. Literally so pritt.

The total amount I withdrew while in Europe was $1,295.15, which combined with $55 in withdrawal fees, is $1,350.15.

What did I spend all that $$$$ on? I didn't keep an exact record, but according to what I remember/train tickets and phone cards I saved (none of this is exact, y'all):

• Food and chocolate: $388.43

• Intercity transport (long train and bus rides): $189.56

• SIM cards and data: $186.50

• Housing: $160.50

• Public transport (short train and bus rides): $101.64

• "Cultural experiences" (museums and junk): $100.50

• "Souvenirs" (pants, sweater, hat, socks, and an extra bag): $81

So, in total, it cost this little boy $2,914.40 to make his dreams come true for 24 days in Eurussia. He thinks he's a winner. 

A sample of the exotic cuisine this little boy sampled in the Eurussian wilds.

I went to BYU's Kennedy Center website and compared this to what it costs to do a study abroad in Europe. I always thought, "Why pay tuition AND pay to travel? That must be a crap-ton expensive!" but I never knew for sure if I was right.

Well, after a quick survey, I found out that I'm right. A study abroad that's 33-days-long and visits 8 countries (I went to 9) is $5,200-5,600 NOT INCLUDING airfare, public transport, museums, and most meals. So, crap, that'd probably be, like, three times more expensive than what I did in the long run.

Of course, there are other study abroad options that are cheaper/might be more worth it (like a water study that's only $2,200-2,400 in Belgium and The Netherlands INCLUDING airfare and museum entry) and if you have a scholarship, it would be cheaper for sure. BUT if you're like me, you've never had any luck getting a scholarship (#BaveragestudentatBYU) and you love figuring things out for yourself without The Man interfering (we all know I like to avoid hanging out with The Man).

So, yeah, I'm a major ... I mean Gordy's ... a major winner. Go Gordy, right? And I coulda done it cheaper!!!! (keep an eye out for those blogs l8r)

Joy that cannot be contained. Honestly, my eyes creep me out in this pic.

And the adventure's not over yet! Maybe some Taiwan or South Amricka this summer? And keep an eye out for #EURUSSIACRAYCRAYVAYCAY2016 next March. And give me money maybe so I can go?

 ****Urban Dictionary spells it both "vaycay" and "vacay," just FYI. Not sure which I prefer -- vote below!

Station Twenty-two (and Three Quarters)

You know a sandwich is good when it takes you a day and a half to stop thinking about it. This story is about one of those sandwiches.

There's a tale of boy who runs into a train station wall and is magically transported to a magical school. I don't know a whole lot about magic (JK -- I do), but running into Station 22 is almost as magical as running into a wall.

This little sandwich shop is located on Center Street, which means that eating here is a hipster adventure. The vibe is a step more hipster than Guru's: the menu is shorter and seasonal (meaning it's based off of ingredients available during that time of year), the space is smaller (giving it a cozy feel), it's filled with the randomest knickknacks (like cowboy boots and toy ships on shelves, sheet music used as light covers, and hunting mounts hanging on walls), and you drink out of MASON JARS. But, like Guru's, it's not a gross hipster place (I'm sure the people here wash their hands and take showers).

The specialty here is sandwiches and the prices are pretty reasonable. Most menu items run around $10.

I ordered the Memphis Chicken Sandwich. This sandwich is made of the crispiest, juiciest piece of fried chicken you can imagine, topped with red cabbage coleslaw and a spicy butter glaze, placed lovingly in a ciabatta bun. I was a little nervous about the red cabbage slaw since, for the most part, I don't believe in pickled foods, but it worked on this sandwich.

Memphis Chicken Sandwich with fries

The chicken is the best piece of fried chicken you've ever tasted: tender, juicy, and crunchy all at once; the coleslaw gives the sandwich the tiniest taste of sour, the cabbage adding a delicate crunch to every bite; and the spicy glaze gives the whole ensemble the slightest little zing. All the flavors stand out from each other, but they simultaneously work together. This sandwich was deeyyyuuung good -- I literally couldn't stop thinking about it all the next day (the fact that I was in church until 4:30 may or may not have had something to do with that).

The fries were good: crispy, delicious. I've also sampled their sweet potato wedges and those are DANG good. However, the fry sauce here is gross -- I can't eat it. It tastes too mustardy and Gordy don't like mustard. I asked for barbecue sauce instead, but even that was gross -- it tasted bitter (come to think of it, they may have given me Worcestershire sauce instead of barbecue sauce ... not sure why). Best to stick with ketchup 'round these parts.

I came here on a date and my date ordered the Club 22. She say it was good (like, she really liked it). I've been here a couple times on dates and neither me nor my dates have ever been disappointed (but I will say I prefer their sandwiches to their burgers).

Club 22 with sweet potato wedges, photo cred to special guest photographer Paige Bennett

So in this back-to-school season, if you want to take yourself on a magical journey, run into Station 22. It won't suck, promise.

The back of cafe has a wall full of soda. I don't support soda, but it's pretty nift to look at.

Sub Zero is okay

So I went to Sub Zero Ice Cream on Friday after the stupid BYU football game. I'd never been, but I'd heard lots of things about it. Mostly, I'd heard that it was real sciencey, so I was intrigued by that. Heads up, though: it's way overpriced (like, $7 for a small bowl). But liquid nitrogen IS expensive, so that's fair.

Sub Zero's thing is that they use liquid nitrogen to freeze your ice cream right before your eyaz. You choose a base (normal premium cream, lowfat cream, custard, yogurt, nondairy milk, soy milk, or rice milk), choose a flavor (they have a plentitude to throw in -- choco powder, fruity flavors, and other junk), and then maybe some mix-ins (like brownie bits or fruit chunks or whatever), then they spray it with the liquid nitrogen (or whatever -- I don't know how it works, but here's a video of the scientific process), then they scoop it into a cone or bowl for you.

Cool process, but how does it taste?

I chose premium cream because it was obviously gonna be the best/tastiest. Then, because I'd been using this super-good-smelling mango and pomegranate soap all week, I chose mango flavor. I didn't get any mix-ins because they cost 70 cents a pop and I'm a cheapskate.

Mango, yo.

The texture was terribly creamy. Just cream on cream on cream rolling through my mouth. I loved it.

Unfortunately, the mango was super fake-tasting and I don't like super fake. I like my ice cream like I like my women: real and THICK. Even though it was creamy enough, the mango tasted like waxy chapstick. After the first couple bites, I got used to it, but it didn't taste like how I liked that soap. So sad.

I sampled some other flavors to see if just the mango was sad. Chocolate was legitimately good, cheesecake was super sugary, and raspberry was good too.

Brownie batter. Mmmmmmmmm.

So if you want to take your tongue for a stroll on the sciencey side, take it to Sub Zero, but maybe ask someone there for a flavor suggestion.

Bahston pizza

Once upon a time in a place called America, there was a city on the east coast where free-blooded Americans and awful British people or, as they were known in that day, Tommy Redcoats, lived together. The Tommy Redcoats lived terribly happy lives, but only because they spent all the times oppressing the free-blooded Americans.

One day, the free-blooded Americans decided to do something to get rid of the Tommy Redcoats. They knew that the Tommy Redcoats really liked tea: they drank it for breakfast, lunch,dinner, and teatime. The free-blooded Americans thought that if they hid all of the Tommy Redcoats' tea, they would leave for good.

So, on Christmas Eve when all the Tommy Redcoats were sleeping, the free-blooded Americans snuck into the Tommy Redcoats' kitchens and took their tea. Then they ran to the local harbor and tossed the tea into the ocean so that the Tommy Redcoats could never find it.

When the Tommy Redcoats awoke in the morning, they went to have their morning spot-o-tea, but couldn't find any. They looked in all their cupboards, but there was no tea to be found. So, they walked up to the American President and asked where they could find some more tea. He said, "Not here. Maybe in British England."

So the Tommy Redcoats packed up all their things and moved back to England, leaving the free-blooded Americans to be freer and bolder than ever before.

This event came to be known as the Great Boston Tea Party and is still written about in American history books today.

Thankfully, the free-blooded Americans and the British (as they are known today) became best friends by means of a young ambassador named Harry Potter and fabulous garden parties between Thomas Roosevelt and Margerie Thatcher.

And that is how the city of Boston came to be world-famous.

Our very own Provo has a restaurant that honors this famous city's cuisine: the Nicolitalia Pizzeria (or, as the younger generation calls it, the NCMO-italia Pizzeria ... boom chicka chicka). I went to visit this landmark of Provo patriotism with an authentic person who once lived in Boston. It was a special special special special special special dinner time. And the person was a girl.

Here, everything is in Bostonian which, as my girl-person told me, means you put a really pronounced "A" sound in random words. So instead of "appetizers," here's it's "appetizAHs," instead of "paremesian," it's "pAHmesiAHn," and the like.

Anyway, I asked the girl-person what we should eat and she, being the Bostonian she is, suggested we got the Nicolitalia Special. We got a large (14'') pizza and a side of breadsticks. The total was about $20 and there was definitely enough to fill both of us up.

The Nicolitalia Special is basically a combo pizza. Sausage, onions, peppAHroni, mushrooms, and peppAHs deck this pizza out. According the the girl I was with, these toppings make the signature Boston pizza. I'll take her word for it. As far as I'm concerned, it was just a dAHn good pizza.

#handmodelstatus

The sausage was just a tinge spicy, the onions were juicy and flavorful, the peppahs were fresh, and the peppahroni and mushrooms blended into the background, enhancing the flavor and texture of the overall pizza. Also, the crust was perfect: just a bit crisp on the outside, yet chewy and fluffy on the inside. Derng.

Proof that we ate it.

The sauce and cheese were also good. The sauce was flavorful, but there wasn't too much of it (a good thing). It seems that the cheese's primary purpose was to keep the toppings attached to the top of the pizza. There was just enough of it to cover the whole surface of the pizza, yet not so much that it wasn't dripping from the pizza. Get out of town, Tommy Redcoats! America's got this pizza under control!

The breadsticks were also good. They were all different, definitely made by hand at the restaurant, not some made-in-China box. Some were skinny, some were lumpy, some were skinny and lumpy. They were all very soft and chewy, definitely not as crisp as the pizza crust. We ordered the house sauce (a mix of marinara and ranch dip) to dip them into. It was a pleasurable experience.

In order to appreciate America's rich heritage of not drinking tea and getting rid of people we don't like, all free-blooded Americans must go here. The pizza's real good and so are the NCMO's boom chicka chicka.

Get rid of the stressmester

Doesn't going to BYU suck sometimes? If you're like me, you flew by in high school (and community college), but doing real college is a lot harder. What make it so hard?!! What's the secret?

Well the secret might be:

1) Before the end of this month, you'll probably have taken at least one  midterm, written two papers about stuff you didn't even want to read about, and read two books you'd never heard of before.

2) Don't forget you're a Mormon, which means you probably need to write a talk, visit your home (or visiting) teachees, and plan a ward activity before the end of the month too.

3) Add to this the twenty hours of work you squeeze in on a weekly basis and:

Your life is a jungle gym of stress, complete with monkey bar midterms, relationship slides, and that spinny-wheel thing that gives you a headache and makes you want to throw up.

 Although you may feel stressed enough, there's one more thing you have to do which is all-too-often ignored: Family History work. Joseph Smith said, “We without [our ancestors] cannot be made perfect; neither can they without us be made perfect” (Doctrine and Covenants 128:18). Recent Church leaders have particularly encouraged youth and young adults (i.e. the computer-literate generation) to be actively involved in Family History research. So basically, do your Family History or go to hell. No pressure.

But when you hear a talk about Family History, you're kind of like:

or



Understandably, Family History work gets pushed to the sidelines in your life. You might go to a Family History class or attend the temple periodically, but aside from that, the hard-core, nitty gritty of researching your ancestors gets pushed back to “someday when.” “Someday, when I don’t have homework anymore,” or, “Someday, when I’m retired.”

Oy vey! With all the fraking things already attacking your attention, what are the effects of doing Family History research on your stress level?

As a student entering my fifth year of college (anticipating my effing sixth), I’ve tried a lot of methods of de-stressing myself. Some, like regular exercise and temple attendance, have been effective. Others, like spending four hours a day on Facebook or watching movies all weekend, have not been effective. I think the reason has something to do with this: if I’m taking a break by doing something I know I should do anyway (like exercise), then I feel less stress. If I take a break by doing something I know I should do sparingly (like check Facebook), I’m just going to stress myself out more. I’m no genius or anything, but it turns out I’m on the right track.

According to the Internet, having a productive hobby can simplify your life by reducing the pressures you feel from other obligations. The Internet says, “Serious hobbyists feel less anxiety, depression and hostility, and enjoy more positive moods than people who spend their time in other ways." A stress-relieving hobby should be challenging, but not so hard that it makes you want to give/throw up. However, passive hobbies, such as watching TV or having a one-man pizza-eating contest, are bad hobbies.

How many nights have you postponed homework by watching a movie, playing a video game, eating a bowl of cookie dough, or staring at your roommates doing their homework, just because you needed some time to de-stress?

A truly effective method of de-stressing is by participating in a guilt-free hobby. Why not do Family History as a guilt-free, stress-reducing hobby?

Family History is hard, but the hard part of Family History work can largely be eliminated if you're a BYU student. Major resources at BYU are available for freeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!

• First, the BYU Family History library is open seven days a week (except for the first and third Sundays of the month) and offers Family History classes.
• Second, Ancestry.com, the world’s LARGEST database of genealogical documents, can be accessed for freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee when you’re hooked up to BYU Internet. Whoa.

As with many hobbies, getting started on your Family History can be hard, but it becomes easier the longer that you do it, and, when you do it at BYU, starting isn’t as awful as it could be.

Also, you could start with an easy part of Family History, then move on to the hard parts as you gain more experience and confidence. Different aspects of Family History include:

• keeping a personal history (easy)
• interviewing family members on the verge of death and recording their stories (easy)
• indexing (never been a fan)
• digitizing old photos and sharing them online (you'd get legit kudos if you did this)
• doing the research for your own ancestors and taking their names to the temple (my favorite)

As you get tired of doing one certain part of Family History work, you can move on to a different part, gaining new skills and knowledge the whole way. #winning

When you do start working on the nitty gritty research for your own ancestors, have a specific goal for a specific ancestor instead of trying to do the work for multiple ancestors at once. Otherwise, you're gonna have a bad time. Also, don't research your ancestors ONLY to do their temple work. The real benefits come from learning who your ancestors actually were.

Family History is totes a worthwhile distraction from school. By spending an hour or so doing Family History research each week, I’m able to find information about ancestors that no one in my family has known before. I’m able to reunite families that have been separated for centuries. Heckfire, doing Family History research and taking my ancestors’ names to the temple is a lot more satisfying than going to the Testing Center has ever been.

If you’ve served a mission, how great would it be to take a break from the constant nagging of homework by feeling the way you did on your mission? Even if you haven’t served a mission, you’ll find that a servicful hobby is much more rewarding than scrolling through Facebook or eating a carton of ice cream.

But perhaps you feel that all of your Family History work has been done already and, therefore, taking up Family History as a hobby would be pointless. My BEST FRIEND Kaden Taylor is the great-great-great-grandson of John Taylor. You'd think he wouldn't have any Family History work to do, but of course he does, just a bit less than the average Mormon.

Kaden tells me that having less ancestors that need temple work allows him to focus his research. He also likes the idea of finding information that no one in his family has known before. Dang, he's great.

Doing Family History was something specially designed for our generation. We’re pros at Facebook-stalking our crushes and googling random crap that we NEED TO KNOW. Why not do the same thing for our ancestors?

“It is no coincidence that FamilySearch and other tools have come forth at a time when young people are so familiar with a wide range of information and communication technologies,” Elder Bednar said in the October 2011 general conference. “The skills and aptitude evident among many young people today are a preparation to contribute to the work of salvation.”

As a Latter-day Saint, you’re also a pro at deciding what’s important and devoting your energy to that. For example, even though money is a very necessary part of life, you set aside ten percent of your income to give as tithing, still having enough to pay the bills and go on dates. You’re also capable of fulfilling a calling, a commitment that’s sometimes a full-time job at other churches, while still fulfilling work and school obligations. Heck, you may even be so good at time management that you set aside work and school obligations for eighteen months to two whole years in order to serve a full-time mission. Being a Latter-day Saint is to your advantage when it comes to setting aside time to do Family History research. Time management and making priorities are something you’ve been doing your whole LDS life.

Adding Family History to your list of priorities is not something that will drag you down and drown you like a sack of unwanted puppies. Family History is a sure-fire way to take your mind off your hectic day-to-day life and allow you to think about what matters most.

Your life is busy and you’re doing your best to meet all your school, work, and Church obligations. Thankfully, you have Family History to take your mind off things every now and again. Take advantage of the resources available at BYU to make Family History research a guilt-free break from your stress-prone life.

Saucy pants

Okay people, so I thought I'd try the thing where I try to teach y'all how to make food again, but this time, I decided to do something that I legitly know how to cook.

Tomato sauce is something that I eat sometimes. It can go on pasta, lasagna, or homemade pizza (but I'd use less warter in the sauce if I made a pizza).

I learned how to make my own sauce when I was in the Russia. We always bought tomato paste, so I learned by ear how to mix the right amount of water and spices to make the perfect sauce. And this sauce is perfect. You start with a tiny can of tomato paste and end up with a whole ton of suited-to-you tomato sauce. Look at you, fancy pants.

Turn this ...

... into food.

Ingredients

6 oz. can of tomato paste
1 C water
1/4 onion
1 1/2 t garlic powder
1 T basil
1 1/2 t oregano
1 t salt
1/2 t pepper

Step 1: The onion

Onions are the basis of taste in so much food. They're a staple to basically any stove-top recipe. A lot of the flavor in soup, sauce, and stir fry recipes is dependent on the onion. If you're cooking something and it's lacking that flavorful boom chicka chicka, chances are you're missing your onion (or garlic, but that comes later).

Start by peeling your onion. Onions are like ogres: they have layers. The top layer (or two) is papery -- you don't want that. Peel it off and throw it away. The layer beneath that is rubbery. You don't want that either; throw it away. The layers beneath that should be crisp and easy to cut through: that's what you want. (This may be "duh" to some of you, but having lived exclusively with guys for the past four years, I know that things like this aren't always intuitive.) Cut a quarter out of your onion and chop it into baby pieces (like, a quarter the size of a french fry or smaller). Throw it into a pan greased with cooking spray, oil, or butter. Heat it to a quarter or half heat. Cook until the onion pieces start to become transparent. You don't want them to turn brown or crispy-looking.

I used red onions, butt it doesn't matter.

Step 2: The sauce

While that's cooking (you can do this step while the onions are cooking if you keep your eyes on them), y'all need to mizz your water with your tomato paste. Dump the insides of your can of tomato paste into a big-ish bowl (like, a big cereal bowl, nothin' huge, though). Once you did this, dump that 1 cup of warter on top. Mix with a fork (or hand) and you'll get a saucy mizzture.

It looks like tomato poop lol.

Tomato diarrhea!

Step 3: Get the Spice Girls

Next, you're gonna want to flavor your sauce. You can just pour the seasonings into the bowl with your tomato-paste-now-tomato-sauce.

1 1/2 teaspoons of Garlic Powder: Like onions, garlic powder is a necessary part of ANYTHING tasting good. Life would be so bland without it. I hear tell it's more flavorful than actual garlic but doesn't make your breath smell abhorrent. Wow. If you cook something, but it's lacking something, throw some extra garlic powder in to fix it.

1 tablespoon of Basil: A delicate herb, it'll make the sauce taste fresh.

1 1/2 teaspoons of Oregano: Given my extensive knowledge of Italian cooking, I can say that oregano is THE Italian spice. Your tomato sauce won't taste like tomato sauce without it. Likewise, if you ever has a pizza that needs a pick-me-up, sprinkle some oregano on it.

1 teaspoon of Salt: Not too much, but just the right amount with make all the other flavors come out (#everysundayschoollessonever).

1/2 teaspoon of Pepper: Packs a punch that your sauce will be boring without.

Mizz all the seasonings with your tomato sauce and stick your finger in it to see if it tastes how you want. #magic

Step 4: Mizz

Pour your bowl of seasoned sauce into the pan of now-cooked onions and heat until the sauce is warm. Then put it on pasta and eat it.

You turned a tiny can of tomato paste into a panful of tomato sauce. That's a big deal, saucy pants.

So this is a super easy recipe that'll save you all the monies in the world and allow you to make a sauce that really speaks to you. Obviously, you can add anything to it that you want (like cooked ground beef or veggies). Is this great or what?